Cognitive Dissonance – CW 241 assignment
Ok. Here is my piece on CD. I figured I would work with my novel characters on this, since this is probably something that will come up as I work on my novels. I hope that this is what was wanted from the assignment:
Cat knew better, but she couldn’t help it. Being near him was like being near a fire on a cold night. The warmth from the heat beat off the chill and the happy glow just pulled one closer to it. She made a point of never looking at him, though it didn’t stop her from being aware of him. She could feel him, like a small sun orbiting the school hallways, an almost constant presence in her thoughts.
It didn’t help that Vi kept asking why Cat had such a goofy grin on her face in their shared classes. Or when Vi would interrupt Cat’s daydreams. Nor did it help when she answered something a teacher asked, the class laughed, and she had no clue of either the question or her answer.
Cat finally pulled herself from her way word thoughts. “I have got to stop. This is ridiculous!” She shoved her books into her locker and shut the door, cringing at the clang that no one else seemed to notice. Vi, whose locker was just down the hall from Cat’s, looked up with narrowed eyes. Much more calmly, Vi placed the books that she wouldn’t be taking home into her locker and closed the door before hefting her bag onto her shoulder.
“You look messed up, girl.” She shouted over the din of the over-crowded hallway. “Have a bad salad at lunch?”
“No.” Cat sighed, placing her history book into her backpack. Vi stood, her pupils condensing as she looked at her friend, and waited for Cat to expand her explanation. Cat didn’t. She lifted her bag and flung it over her shoulder, almost smacking an innocent bystander (well, bywalker) in the face. “Sorry!” Cat shouted after the girl, her face growing warm.
“You cannot be that hung up over a guy. It’s impossible.” Vi commented after a few seconds.
Cat glanced around the hall, “geez, Vi. Why don’t you announce it on the loudspeaker?”
“Chill already. No one heard me. It’s much too noisy.”
The two girls made their way down the hall, Cat tried hard not to but was unable to stop herself from looking around, trying to catch a glimpse of a familiar dark head.
The moment they were outside, Cat felt as if a weight lifted off her shoulders. Now she wouldn’t have that urge to look around. She didn’t need to search all the passing faces for a pair of liquid black eyes, or that ready smile.
“You should just tell him.” Vi tossed herself onto a bench, at the same moment, throwing her hair elegantly. Cat frowned at her. It was unfair for one person to be able to have so much grace and fluidity. If Cat tried that same move, she would have ended up making a fool of herself, probably tangling her hair into the back of the bench, or worse, missing the seat entirely and landing in the slushy mud of the sidewalk.
“Um, Vi. We don’t date teachers, here.”
“Why not? First of all, he’s not a teacher, he’s a tern.” Vi had a habit of messing up words with her accent. Cat didn’t bother to correct her, knowing that the other girl meant intern. “Second, it’s not like you are taking his class. He’s probably hot into you, too. I mean, he did stop you from getting plowed by a bus the other day.”
Cat felt her jaw fall open at the comment. “Are you from another planet or something?”
“Of course not. But that seems like a stupid rule. I mean he’s only, what-? Three years older than you? And he is totally hot.”
“I am not listening to this.” Throwing her hands into the air, Cat stalked away from the dark haired girl. For a second, she wondered if she would talk to Vi again, but instantly dismissed the thought. Stupid Violet, she thought, stomping through a puddle. The mud splashed back at her, as if in retaliation for her rudeness, splattering her favorite jeans with sidewalk grime and an old soggy leaf. Her already trickling temper flared to life. She wanted to scream, to hit something. Her temper was almost constantly at the surface lately. And she knew why.
The moment the thought entered her head, her temper started to dissipate. In her daydreams, she was thinking the same things that Vi had just told her.
The effective scene of the protagonist wrestling with cognitive dissonance is painted especially well at the close of this piece. The rise in her ire and the slippery, unavoidable acknowledgement that her friend Vi is right. Nice work.
A couple critiques: Strive for genuine simili’s, descriptions, and predicaments. You have beautiful original descriptions that do justice butted up next to some very unoriginal cliche’d descriptions that are less necessary in lieu of the creative lines that have already served your characters.
Also “wayward” and not “way word”…otherwise the text is very clean, the use of dialogue is fluid, the sentences are varied and interesting, and the piece on a whole is easy to read. Thank you for this.